


Drink, Bang and Be Merry

by alivinghumangirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: (Some) Smut, A Very Bunker Christmas, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Blow Jobs, Cas Bakes Dean a Pie, Cas watches Dean sleep, Christmas, Coming Out, Cuddling & Snuggling, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Frottage, Gay Bar, Gift Giving, Hand Jobs, Humor, I'm just gonna go ahead and tag sex acts- this is a thing I'm doing now I guess?, M/M, Men of Letters Bunker (Supernatural), Mistletoe, New Year's Eve, New Year's Fluff, Schmoop, Sex in/on the Impala (Supernatural), Should I be tagging specific sex acts- are people filtering tags by type of sex?, Turducken, What are tags even?, dean and cas dance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 23:41:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 15,170
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27824689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alivinghumangirl/pseuds/alivinghumangirl
Summary: Dean thinks Cas needs get laid. When Cas tells him that he doesn’t want to go to a bar to pick up random women, Dean decides they should go to a bar to pick up random men instead. Only Cas isn’t interested in random guys either. He still goes to the bar though:Cas sniffed his drink thoughtfully before taking a sip, which he valiantly managed not to spit out when Dean asked him, “So, what kind of guy do you think you'd like? Leather daddy, twink, bear, otter?”“What's an otter?” Cas said, sounding puzzled.“It's like a small bear. If anything, you think it'd be a koala, right? Never made sense to me.”Now with a bonus New Year's Eve chapter!
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 46
Kudos: 291





	1. Chapter 1

“’Tis the season, Cas. You should get out there, have some fun. Drink, bang and be merry!” 

Sam glanced up from his laptop. 

“Pretty sure that's not how the saying goes, dude." 

“That's how it should go,” Dean insisted, shrugging. “It's not like you’re suddenly the expert in getting into the Christmas spirit just because you put up some lame tree.” He looked pointedly at the scraggly artificial tree sitting in the corner of the bunker library, the trunk wonky and the tinsel threadbare. 

“At least I tried,” Sam grumbled defensively. 

“I'm trying too- trying to get Cas laid!” 

“Whatever, Dean. As if this is about Cas anyway. You’re the one who wants to blow off research and go to a bar.” 

“Hey!” Dean objected. “I’m a complicated guy. I can have more than one reason for doing something. Maybe I think Cas needs to get laid and, _also_ _,_ I need a drink.” 

Cas shifted uncomfortably in his seat across the table from Sam and Dean. 

“I'm not like you. I can't just go to the bar and pick up some strange woman.” Cas looked mortified by the thought. 

“Give yourself some credit. You could have any woman you wanted,” Dean said consolingly. 

_“_ _Dean_ _,_ you’re not listening. I don’t want a woman.” 

“But...” 

_“_ _No_ _!”_

“No women, right, ok...” Dean looked thoughtful and a little awkward before rallying. “That's fine, dude, I'm open minded, I can take you to a gay bar, wingman for you, find you some hot guy to take home. I promise I'll try not to let _all_ the pretty ones get distracted by me,” he assured Cas, winking. 

“Really, Dean, you? You're going to a gay bar?” Sam asked sceptically. 

“What? I’m secure in myself!” he said defensively. “I'm comfortable going to a gay bar. Hell, I'm practically a friend of Dorothy... Well, I met her that one time when she was dating Charlie anyway.” 

Sam raised his eyebrows and then just sat there shaking his head, confused, whatever he was looking at on his laptop forgotten. Dean’s attention was all for Cas though. 

“Cute guy like you, Cas, you'd clean up. Not that I know what gay guys are into,” Dean added quickly. “But I'm pretty sure you'd be up anyone's alley... Or they'd be up yours if you'd prefer to bottom!" Dean smirks at Cas. “Yeah, they'd be into you.” He elbows Sam. “Into him, get it?!” 

“And that's my cue to leave.” Sam pushed away his laptop, stood up from the table and beat a hasty retreat.

Somehow, he wasn't sure how since it certainly hadn't been his intention, Cas found himself in the passenger seat of the Impala. Dean slid into the driver's seat, grabbing his phone instead of a cassette to put on some music. 

“Not my usual speed but it's kinda catchy,” Dean said of the music filling the car. He pointed at Cas and winked before he started to loudly, if somewhat inaccurately, sing along. “Cas, I wanna take you to a gay bar, I wanna take you to a gay bar, I wanna take you to a gay bar, gay bar, gay bar!" He enthusiastically drummed his hands on the steering wheel along to the upbeat tune. “I've got something to put in you,” Dean continued to sing, making Cas squirm. 

Thirty minutes later they pulled into a dingy parking lot behind a roadside bar. It looked much like the sort of places they normally drank on the road, slightly beat-up, wooden siding in need of a coat of paint, except this place had a rainbow flag in the window and the music that filtered out sounded more pop-like than their usual haunts. 

Dean hopped out of the Impala and lead the way to the entrance, opening the door. 

“C’mon, Cas, loosen up. Let's get you laid!” 

“Why are you so preoccupied with me having sex?” the angel asked, perplexed. 

“I'm not! I just want you to be happy.” He looked back at Cas, still stood hesitantly by the car. “You coming or what?” 

Sighing, Cas joined him, since that seemed to be what would make _Dean_ happy, and that was what Cas wanted. He let himself be shepherded inside by Dean’s hand on his lower back. 

“Right.” Dean clapped his hands once, then rubbed them together thoughtfully. “Why don’t you sit down and I’ll get us some drinks. They’ve got whiskey here like any other bar.” 

Cas sat at a small round table and fidgeted with a coaster while Dean waited at the bar looking surprisingly comfortable. He laughed at something another patron said to him, which made Cas frown, though he wasn’t sure why. Dean swaggered over to the table holding a tumbler and a cocktail glass, the latter of which he placed in front of Cas as he sat down. 

“Why is my drink green?” Cas asked suspiciously. 

“I've seen the faces you make when we’re drinking whiskey and you think I’m not looking.” 

“I think maybe that time I drank a liquor store ruined whisky for me,” Cas confided before asking, “What is it?” 

“Appletini. Thought you might like it,” Dean said, shrugging one shoulder. “And maybe the situation calls for something a little more fruity.” 

Cas sniffed it thoughtfully before taking a sip, which he valiantly managed not to spit out when Dean asked him, “So, what kind of guy do you think you'd like? Leather daddy, twink, bear, otter?” 

“What's an otter?” Cas said, sounding puzzled. 

“It's like a small bear. If anything, you think it'd be a koala, right? Never made sense to me.” 

“But what’s a bear?” 

Dean nodded at a big, buff guy over at the bar whose sleeves were rolled up to show hairy forearms. 

“And a twink?” 

He turned around and nodded in another direction, toward a cute, young guy holding court at a table of laughing friends. 

“Leather daddy?” Cas asked, face burning. 

Dean looked around. 

“Hmm, don’t think we’ve got any in tonight,” he said sounding... disappointed? 

“How do you know so much about this?” 

“Er, no reason. I know a lotta things about a lotta things...” Dean mumbled evasively. 

An awkward silence descended as Dean drank his whisky. His gaze flitted around the dim bar rather than meeting Cas’s eyes. There was a tiny dance floor that no one was dancing on. People, men mostly, used the space to stand there in small groups drinking instead. Despite the lack of dancers, the disco lights above the floor were switched on. The cycling lights bathed Dean’s cheek in a rainbow of colour as Cas watched him quietly. He wondered why this didn’t feel as comfortable as sharing a drink in the bunker. Frustrated, he twirled his glass by the stem before blurting out, “I'm not really sure this place is for me.” 

“Why? You said you're not interested in women like that, so here we are. Gay guys.” Dean gestured round the bar. "Gay guys as far as the eye can see," he said, looking at Cas very directly in a way he couldn’t quite decipher. Cas cursed the fact that sometimes he still- _still,_ after all these years of living among humans- had difficulty interpreting facial expressions. He desperately wished he knew what Dean was thinking right now. 

_“Dean,_ _”_ he said harshly, not knowing if it was a reprimand or a request. 

“You know I’m doing this for you, right?” He sounded frustrated too. “Tell me, Cas, what do you want?” 

_“Dean..."_ Cas trailed off. He wasn’t sure if that one word was an aborted attempt at an answer he couldn’t articulate or if it was the answer itself. Dean stared at him. Cas actually looked flustered, as flustered as an angel that emotionally repressed could look anyway. 

“I'm... it's not... It's not about ‘equipment’. I can't just have meaningless sex with someone I don't know. If I f-fucked..." Cas stumbled over the word before saying it more emphatically, “If I _fucked_ someone, it would have to be someone I cared about, someone I trusted... someone like you...” 

A sharp breath burst out of Dean. He wet his lips before squeaking out, "Me?" 

“Like you," Cas clarified quietly, looking away, trying to back pedal before giving in. "You," he admitted. "It could only ever be you." 

The cheesy pop music had faded far into the background and all Dean could hear was the sound of his own heart thudding in his ears. His brain felt staticky and his fingers vaguely tingly. He leant across the table and placed a chaste kiss on Cas's lips. At least that was what he planned, just a light touch, a promise for more, later, when they're alone. But he couldn’t help opening his mouth a little, sliding his tongue between Cas's lips, just for a taste, a tiny taste... He could taste the damn stupid cocktail he’d brought him and he could taste something even sweeter that he suspected was just Cas. It wasn’t long before he felt drunk on the kiss and barely holding onto control. When he realised he'd dragged Cas halfway across the table, he let go of him and fell back into his seat. Breathing heavily, he stared at Cas’s dazed face. 

“Dean... Dean, I need you,” he whimpered, looking absolutely helpless under the force of his lust, unsure what to do with feelings stronger than anything he'd experienced before, confused by unfamiliar urges. 

Dean’s own nerves dissolved under the confidence he got from knowing that Cas wanted him. So, he sounded a little cocky when he said, “I know, Cas, I know what you need.” And damned if he didn’t want to give it to him right here but he didn't want to fuck Cas in a bar bathroom. Well, ok, he _did_ want to fuck Cas in a bar bathroom. He wanted to fuck him anywhere Cas would have him. But he also had some sappy idea that their first time ought to be special. If there wasn’t going to be candles and roses, there should at least be a bed. He grabbed Cas’s hand, hauled him to his feet and hurried him outside. 

They stumbled through the little dirt parking lot. No one else was out there, so Dean shoved Cas up against the Impala and kissed him, tongue sweeping inside and taking ownership of the angel’s mouth, hand grabbing the back of his neck to hold him exactly where he wanted him, leaning his weight in to pin him to the car. 

“Dean,” Cas panted. _“Please...”_ He writhed against Dean slightly, not having the leverage to thrust properly, as he clearly wanted to. 

“Can’t wait, huh? Get in the backseat,” Dean ordered, looking very pleased with himself and opened the door. 

Cas looked both anxious and expectant. He sat down on the edge of the seat, legs still outside the car, before Dean pushed him back, further inside and then down until his head hit the leather. He climbed in after, insinuating himself between Cas’s legs, one hand on his chest, stroking over his heart. He was still for a moment, just looking down at him, as if deciding where to start. Then he just dove for his mouth and kissed him hard, hands going to the buttons of that damn dress shirt he always wore, frantically undoing them, the last few ripping off in his haste, the buttons pinging into the corners of the car. Dean pulled back to watch his face before he moved onto Cas’s pants and undid them with equal speed. Cas shifted his hips up slightly so Dean could pull both pants and underwear down to his thighs. Dean took him in his hand and then he just froze for a moment, stared at the wonder of his hand on Cas’s cock. His hand. Cas’s cock. _Fuck._ And Cas laid there, breathing hard, looking up at him, as if Dean would be the answer to all his prayers if he’d just move that damn hand! So, he did, stroking Cas up and down, hesitantly at first, then with a little more conviction when Cas began to moan. He knocked his hands away way all too soon and Dean was disappointed until he realised that Cas was reaching for _his_ zipper. 

“I’m not sure what to do...” Cas admitted, biting his lip as he unzipped him. 

Dean wasn’t sure what to do either because wanted to do everything with Cas, he wanted to suck him deep into his throat, to touch him everywhere, he wanted Cas's mouth all over his body, he wanted to beg Cas to let him fuck his ass, maybe he even wanted _Cas_ to fuck _him._ All those wants just tumbled around inside him till he wasn’t sure where to start. In the end he just laid down on Cas and thrust against him. He could feel Cas’s dick pushing up against his hip and the skin of Cas’s pelvis against his own hard cock felt amazing but it wasn’t quite what he wanted. He shifted slightly and lined them up so Cas’s dick was pressed against his own and that felt even better. Dean wrapped his hand around both of them, then took Cas’s hand and wrapped it around the other side. He let out a contented sound as he began to move. The pressure of Cas’s cock against his own, the feel of their palms, the closeness was exquisite. The rest could wait, right now, this was perfect. He just needed to feel Cas's skin against his and he needed them to come together. The latter didn’t take long at all. The whole thing was quick, dirty and wonderful. 

“Sorry,” Cas said after, while Dean was still floating in a post-orgasm haze. 

“What on earth have you got to be sorry for?” Dean snorted and shifted his weight so he wasn’t lying quite so heavily on Cas. “I think you could do whatever you want for the rest of eternity and you'd still never need to apologise to me!" 

“I know you wanted to go home before we...” He waved a hand vaguely. Dean wasn't sure in the dim light but he thought maybe, just maybe, Cas was blushing. It was kind of adorable and only got more so when Cas continued sheepishly, “I just couldn't wait.” 

Dean took Cas's face in his hands, forcing him to meet his eyes. “It was perfect. Here was the perfect place. I got to have my baby in my Baby,” he quipped, patting the backseat affectionately before kissing Cas. 

Dean rose to his knees but put a quelling hand on Cas’s chest when he moved to rise too. “Wait.” He took off his flannel shirt, leaving him in a T-shirt that stretched temptingly across his pecs. Cas reached out to stroke his chest as Dean reached down, using the shirt to gently wipe Cas's exposed stomach clean. 

“Thank you,” Cas said solemnly. 

Dean looked self-conscious, as if he felt awkward about being caught doing something so tender. 

“I just don't want to get come on the upholstery,” he said sardonically, turning away. “Again...” Cas thought he heard him mutter. 

“Don't do that, Dean.” Cas sighed. 

“What?” 

He raised his hand to Dean’s face, turning his head back to look at him. 

“Use humour to put up walls.” He stroked Dean's cheek softly. “Don't hide from me.” 

“Rome wasn't built in a day, Cas.” 

“But you want to build it?” he asked urgently. 

“Yes. I want to build something with you, Cas. A relationship, a life together.” Dean exhaled and leant into Cas’s hand. “I'll try not to shut down on you. But you have to be realistic, Cas, I'll probably always be an emotionally stunted asshole.” 

“As long as you're my asshole.” 

Dean chuckled and moved forward to rest his forehead against Cas's. “Always,” he whispered across Cas’s lips. Then shifted to give him a hand up. “Let's go home, there’s a lot more I want to do to you.” 


	2. Chapter 2

It had been a long time since Dean had woken up next to someone he cared about. A long time since he’d woken up next to anyone at all. His head was still foggy with sleep and his eyes were still closed but he could feel Cas’s presence next to him, radiating warmth and comfort. Waking up next to Cas was somehow simultaneously an absolute surprise and the most natural thing in the world. Dean snuggled in closer to the pliant body beside him and felt Cas’s arm tighten slightly around his waist. 

As it turned out, Dean hadn't done a lot more to Cas when they got home. After the drive back, the initial adrenaline and urgency of their first encounter had ebbed and Dean wondered if he ought to be taking things slow. He had taken Cas to his room and slowly stripped him out of his clothes, most of his clothes anyway. He had left their boxers on. They had gotten into bed and simply cuddled. Cas had seemed happy just to be close to him and Dean, well, Dean Casanova Winchester had actually been hesitant to take things further. He was kind of nervous... a lot nervous... sort of paralysed by fear in fact. Being God's gift to women didn’t really guarantee also being God’s gift to men, or, more specifically, to Cas. 

The momentary panic of last night had faded by the morning though and Dean was feeling more sanguine. Spending the night sleeping next to each other had calmed him. _Wait, Cas doesn't sleep._ Dean’s eyes sprang open. Cas’s face was only inches away and his bright blue eyes were already looking at Dean. 

“Cas, did you spend the whole night watching me sleep?” 

“Not the whole night. Only the first few hours. Then I just held you. It was relaxing to close my eyes and lie here with you in my arms.” 

Okay, that was a little creepy but kind of sweet. And didn't that just sum up so much of Cas. He was endearingly weird. Dean smiled fondly at him and ran his hand up the soft skin of Cas’s side because, apparently, he got to do that now. He got to touch the nearly naked angel in his bed. He smiled wider and Cas smiled back, that little quirk of his lips and crinkling of his eyes that was his version of a full-on grin. Dean closed the gap between them to gently kiss those smiling lips. 

“I’m gonna grab some breakfast. I’ll be back in a sec. Why don’t you wait here?” Dean felt rather reluctant to let Cas out of his bed now he finally had him there. 

“Alright.” 

Dean was back in five minutes flat with a wooden tray loaded with toast and coffee. He kicked the door open and shut, then carried it over to the bed where Cas was lying in the exact same position he’d been in when Dean left. Oh, he looked so good in Dean’s bed. Balancing the tray carefully, Dean climbed in beside him. 

“It’s just toast and coffee but I brought peanut butter and grape jelly for the toast. I know you like PB&J...” _Wait, fuck._ “Liked... shit, you liked it when you were human but it’s not the same now, is it?” _Right, good job, Dean, make breakfast for the guy who doesn’t eat because that will definitely make him want to date you._

“It’s a very nice gesture, Dean,” Cas reassured him, sitting up. “It’s not the same as when I was human but I have been eating a bit more food lately. I’ve found that I can taste it more if the flavours are strong, something sweet or spicy.” 

Right, yeah, he had noticed that come to think of it. The other day Cas had shared some of the pie Dean was eating. And a few weeks ago, he had made himself a viciously hot vindaloo and Cas had taken a few forkfuls of it straight from Dean’s plate. 

Shoving the tray onto Cas’s lap, Dean hopped out of bed and raced to the kitchen. He returned triumphantly holding a bottle of maple syrup aloft. 

“It’s the sweetest thing we’ve got in the bunker.” 

“I think you’re the sweetest thing in the bunker,” Cas said seriously, making Dean laugh. 

Cas was flirting with him! It was totally corny and Dean was pretty sure that he was a bad influence on Cas if he’d started spouting lines like that but it warmed his heart. And maybe had an effect on certain regions lower than his heart. What could he say? He was easy when it came to Cas. Give him a cheesy compliment and he was blushing like a fourteen-year-old girl and getting boners at the drop of a hat like a fourteen-year-old boy. 

He scrambled back into bed next to Cas and starting spreading peanut butter on a slice of toast. When he was done, he poured a ridiculous amount of syrup on it and handed it to Cas. 

“I can taste the sweetness,” Cas told him happily, munching on the toast and definitely getting crumbs in the bed. 

Dean was just emerging from his room with the tray when Sam walked down the corridor. His glance took in the two cups on the tray and flicked to the slightly open door behind him. Dean followed his gaze to the bed. Cas was lying down again because there'd been more cuddling once the toast was finished. All that was visible from this angle was an indistinguishable lump beneath the covers. Dean pulled the door shut behind him and turned to face a smirking Sam. 

“You brought someone home? Only you could hookup with a woman at an actual gay bar!” Sam was shaking his head and looking incredulous. 

Dean didn’t think the scenario was particularly unbelievable. Not given the fact that the only other time he’d been to a gay bar he had picked a girl up. He definitely hadn’t been trying to prove something or anything. She’d just caught his eye was all. Charlie had taken him along to a gay bar one night and they’d ending up playing rock paper scissors to see who got to try their luck with the hot bi chick they’d met. He’d won but Charlie had still gone home with another equally gorgeous woman herself. 

“Poor Cas,” Sam continued. “I hope you didn't leave him to fend for himself.” 

“Ah, actually, that’s not a chick I hooked up with... That's, uh, that’s Cas in there.” 

“You hooked up Cas?” asked Sam, sounding confused, like he wasn’t sure if Dean was joking or not. 

“Yes... No! Cas isn’t some hookup. We're...together... like a thing, with feelings and stuff,” Dean said, shrugging awkwardly. 

“So, you're...." 

“I'm bi, dude. I like guys and I like Cas and I'm bi,” Dean said in rush, words tumbling out of his mouth haphazardly. 

“Oh, cool, thanks for telling me.” 

“Thanks for telling you?” Dean asked, feeling oddly offended at the lack of reaction. Not that he’d thought Sam wouldn’t be cool with it, of course he would be, he was Sam. He’d just expected surprise or an outpouring of support or something. It felt strange to build yourself up to tell someone something important and then have them act like it was no big deal. “That's it?” 

“Well, yeah, what do you want a parade or something? That's not till June man!” 

Sam’s dumb joke broke the tension and the anxious, fight or flight feeling that had been building in Dean dissipated. 

“Bitch,” he said without heat and shoved Sam’s shoulder. 

“What? I was trying not to make a fuss, you jerk. I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable, okay? You never talk about this stuff.” Sam put a hand on his arm and squeezed. “But seriously, I’m happy for you and I'm happy you told me. And if you want to talk, I'm right here.” 

“Um, yeah, I think I'd like that,” Dean admitted and pushed the tray he was holding into Sam’s hands. “Can you take this to the kitchen? I'm just going to, uh, check on Cas.” 

“We’re standing in front of the only exit, I'm pretty sure he hasn’t gone anywhere.” 

“Shut up, Sam.” Dean could hear his brother laughing his way to the kitchen as he ducked back inside his room. 

He found Cas up and dressed, standing next to the bed. Dean walked over to him and took his hand. 

“Hey, we good?” 

“Of course,” Cas said, squeezing his hand reassuringly. “I heard you in the hall. Go talk to Sam. I’m fine.” 

“You sure?” 

“Yes.” Cas took their joined hands, raised them to his lips and softly kissed Dean’s knuckles. “I was planning on finishing that old Men of Letters report I’ve been reading anyway. I’ll be in the library.” 

Sam and Dean sat in the kitchen for an hour talking, really talking. This had been a long time coming, not just Dean's admission to Sam but his acknowledgment to himself that he was bisexual. He’d known on some level that he wasn’t exactly straight but it was the kind of thing he tried not to think about too hard. He’d been thinking about it a lot more ever since Cas had come into his life though. It was such a relief to finally speak the words that had been rattling around in his head with increasingly loudness for so long. Sam’s acceptance of his sexuality sort of felt like a sign that he should accept himself too. 

After their talk, Dean felt so much lighter. This thing that he had told himself was inconsequential had been weighing him down more than he had realised. But now the weight was gone, he was free. He could be himself with his brother, he could be himself with his... boyfriend. He was pretty sure he had a boyfriend now and it was awesome. 

Dean was grinning giddily when he left Sam to go find Cas in the library. He was sitting in one of the dark leather wingback chairs there. Cas smiled up at Dean as he entered and set the report he’d been reading down on the little round table next to the chair. Dean made a move toward the empty chair across from Cas’s but Cas grabbed him and pulled him down to sit on him instead. Dean could feel his cheeks warm as he shifted to get comfortable and put his arms around Cas’s neck. It felt like he settled into his own skin as he settled into Cas’s lap. 

“Hey there.” 

“Hey,” Cas said, drawing Dean even closer so his side was resting up against Cas’s chest. Dean leant into him because apparently this was another thing he got to do now, have Cas cradle him in his arms. One of his hands was gripping Dean’s hip while the other stroked soothing circles on his back. “How did your talk with Sam go?” 

“Good. He was really supportive.” 

“I’m glad.” 

“Me too,” Dean said and bent to kiss Cas. 

One kiss led to another and it soon became a full on make out session. Dean was never going to feel the same way about the library again. He was sure he was going to get a flashback to this moment the next time he was sitting at the table and caught sight of this chair. There were probably going to be a lot of inappropriate hard-ons while trying to do research in the future. 

After a while, Dean drew back slightly. As much as Sam had been supportive of his sexuality, he really didn’t need to see Dean grinding up against his boyfriend in their shared living space. And that was definitely where this was headed if he didn't slow down. 

Once his lust clouded brain started working again, Dean realised that he’d been sitting on Cas for a long time. Sure, he’d just been thinking about how much lighter he was but that was purely metaphorical lightness. He was still a pretty big guy. 

“Aren't I a little heavy to be sitting on your lap like you're some mall Santa?” 

"Nonsense, I'm an angel. You weigh nothing to me. Besides, this is exactly where you’re supposed to be,” Cas told him in a deep voice that sent shivers down his spine. 

“Yeah, I think it is,” Dean agreed. 

“So,” Cas whispered in his ear. “What do you want for Christmas?” 

“Just you.” Dean felt Cas’s lips curve into a smile against his skin. 


	3. Chapter 3

Sam wandered into the library while Dean was sitting on Cas’s lap. He looked a little surprised by his brother's position but didn't say anything. Frankly, Dean thought he should be grateful they had all their clothes on. Ever the nerd, Sam reminded them there was reading to be done. Cas, who was rather more diligent than Dean was at the moment, agreed that they should get on with the research they’d abandoned yesterday. Sadly, sitting in Cas’s lap wasn’t really the best position for getting work done, so they’d all gone to sit at the table. Dean sat next to Cas as they researched and it was the same as any other day except Cas's chair was closer to his and Cas's hand was resting on his thigh as they read. 

Dean tried to concentrate, he really did, but being so close to Cas the whole day felt like drawn out foreplay. Admittedly, it was weirdly PG rated foreplay, but, still, Dean felt like his whole body was humming with sexual awareness by the evening. He’d wanted to get Cas back into bed since they left it this morning and the urge had only grown. Something held him back, not so much nerves anymore, he just didn’t want Cas to think this was only about sex, that that was all Dean wanted from him when it so much more. He wanted everything, he wanted all of Cas and he wanted to give the entirety of himself to Cas in return. 

Dean had been reading the same page for an hour. So, it was a relief when Sam finally said goodnight and went to his room. That meant they could go to theirs...well, Dean’s room really but somehow it already felt like theirs because Dean wanted to sleep next to Cas every night now. 

“It’s getting late,” Dean said, yawning and stretching his arms above his head. He was pretty sure the movement drew attention to the play of muscles across his chest if Cas’s rapt gaze was any indication. “Wanna come to bed?” 

“Very much so.” 

Dean stood by the bed in their room, smiling at a delightfully flustered Cas. 

“Can you...I want to...” Cas didn't seem to be able to express himself verbally at the moment. But that was fine, his hands were eloquent enough. They were gently tugging Dean’s shirt down over his shoulders, then raising his t-shirt over his head and ushering him to the bed. At Cas’s urging, Dean lay and Cas followed him down. He knelt above Dean’s prone form, hands stroking across his chest and stomach, eyes following their path. His touch was reverent and his gaze adoring. Dean’s pants weren’t even off and this felt like the most intense sexual encounter of his life. The way Cas was looking at him made it kind of hard to breathe. 

Cas lowered himself to lie across Dean and began a leisurely exploration of his mouth. He pressed soft kisses to his lips and licked inside, mapping the contours with his tongue. The tender attention left Dean feeling a little vulnerable in a way that shoving someone up against a wall and fucking their brains out never did. But, he supposed, this wasn’t just fucking, this was making love and Dean didn’t normally do that. It scared him a little. He didn’t push Cas away though, he pulled him closer. Dean gripped his shoulders and sighed into his mouth. 

“Yes, yes...” he murmured in approval when he felt Cas’s hands go to his fly. Cas was driving him wild and he was so, so ready for more. His own hands reached to undo Cas’s pants too and he was surprised when Cas batted them away. And a little concerned that Cas wasn’t craving Dean’s touch the way he was craving his, that Dean wasn’t making him just as crazy as he was. 

“Don’t you want me to...” Dean questioned, voice quiet and a little hurt. 

“No, no... I'm touching you. I need to concentrate- I can't concentrate if you're doing that,” Cas explained. 

_Oh._ Maybe he was driving Cas to distraction after all. Dean was momentarily disappointed not to be touching Cas too, but as soon as his fingers brushed against him through his boxer shorts, he found he was happy to lie back and let Cas have his way with him. Cas finished undressing him and then sat next to him fully clothed on the bed as he stared down at Dean’s naked body for a long time, taking it all in. An entirely unintentional little thrust of Dean’s hips drew Cas’s attention to his neglected cock. He was already panting and so desperate for any touch that he was pressing up into the empty air hoping for Cas’s hand to come down and meet him halfway. Cas reached down hesitantly and placed his hand flat on top of Dean’s cock, still for a moment as Dean thrust up against his palm. Just the slight pressure of his hand felt so good, even motionless as it was. Then he started moving and his light, cautious touches completely undid Dean. Somehow, a tentative handjob from Cas felt like a fucking revelation. 

Cas’s fingertips skimmed up and down his shaft. Dean couldn’t tell if it was deliberate teasing or if it just hadn’t occurred to Cas to wrap his fist around him. Either way, it was having an effect on him. He couldn’t contain the needy whimper that fell from his lips. Cas looked rather pleased with himself at that. He was watching what he was doing intently. Cas tilting his head and looking at Dean’s dick studiously was another thing that Dean was going to file under endearingly weird, not to mention strangely hot. It occurred to him that this was all new to Cas. This aspect of the human body was unchartered territory for him, but damned if he wasn’t going to chart it. Cas’s thumb skated over the head of his cock where it was slick with precome. He looked fascinated by the droplets of liquid beading there, swirling the moisture across the tip in slow circles. He trailed his fingers down Dean’s shaft and moved lower to stroke over his sack, experimental touches that went from caresses to cupping the weight of Dean’s balls in his palm. A gentle squeeze made Dean moan. Cas smiled and looked thoughtful. Dean could practically see him mentally cataloguing that touch, putting it under the heading of ‘this feels good', learning his body and taking note of what he liked. 

Dean let Cas explore until he felt like he was losing his mind. The soft touches were both too good and not enough. He needed more, he needed harder. Dean retrieved his usual jerk off lube from his bedside table. He took Cas’s hand and poured a little into his palm as Cas watched him curiously. 

“You hand feels amazing, this just makes it feel even better,” he told him, reaching up to cup Cas’s cheek. “Okay?” 

Cas nodded and let Dean manoeuvre his hand to grasp his cock more firmly. Dean placed his own hand over Cas’s and showed him how to touch him, a bit harder, fast strokes up and down with a little twist at the top so his palm brushed over the head of Dean’s cock in a way that made his breath catch in his throat. 

“That’s so good, you’re so good, baby,” Dean said hoarsely. 

He pulled Cas’s head down to kiss him as he thrust frantically into his hand. Dean fisted both his hands in Cas’s hair. His movements grew more erratic as Cas’s touch become more sure. Dean was unravelling. Partly it was the feel of Cas’s clever fingers on him and partly it was the sheer pleasure of knowing that it was _Cas_ touching him. Finally, it was his hand on Dean’s cock instead of Dean’s own while he tried not to imagine it was Cas’s. The reality was so much better than the dream. He felt his orgasm building higher and higher until he came with a sound that was almost a shout. 

“Fuck!” he gasped. “That was... fuck... that was awesome, Cas. Just give me a minute and then I’m gonna return the favour.” 

“This isn’t a ‘favour’ that needs to be returned, Dean.” 

“But I want to, I really fucking want to,” he assured Cas and pulled him down into a breathless kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was going to be longer but unfortunately life happened, stupid life. Dean will be returning the favour in the next chapter though.


	4. Chapter 4

Cas, still fully clothed, was lying on his side curled into Dean. His hand was tracing swirling patterns on Dean’s naked chest, which was moving up and down rather rapidly. Dean, who’d been looking up at the ceiling in a daze, turned to Cas. 

“How are you dressed right now?” he asked. 

“You haven't undressed me.” 

“We should fix that,” Dean said, rolling them over so Cas was underneath him. “Right, my turn now...or your turn, I guess, depending on how you look at it.” He grinned down at Cas wolfishly as he made short work of his clothes. 

Eager though he was, Dean felt kind of nervous about touching Cas... or maybe he was just excited, either way, his heart was racing. Dean didn't have a whole lotta experience with other people's dicks, only that one time with Cas. But he was very familiar with his own dick, so he was hoping that would give him somewhere to start. Not that Cas would necessarily like the exact same things as Dean, but at least he wasn’t going in completely blind. 

Dean leant down to kiss Cas because that, at least, he had figured out. He continued until Cas was shifting restlessly beneath him, then he wrapped his hand around Cas’s cock. Dean felt the same slight sense of unreality when he touched Cas as he had the first time, like this just too good to be true. He stopped kissing Cas for a minute so he could look down at his hand stroking him. 

“Fuck, Cas, your cock is gorgeous, you know that?” 

By the baffled expression on Cas’s face, he hadn’t known that. Dean hadn’t known cocks could be gorgeous either, had thought of them more in functional terms rather than aesthetic. But Cas’s cock looked good in his hand, long and thick, curving upwards in an intriguing away, the flushed head peeking out from the top of his fist. Dean couldn’t help wondering what it tasted like. He wasn’t quite sure if he was ready to find out or not, so he went back to kissing Cas. Dean pressed soft kisses along his throat, relishing the gasp Cas gave as he sucked a tender spot beneath his jaw. He went lower to kiss across his chest. His tongue flicked out to give Cas’s nipple a light lick, eliciting a groan. He drew the nub into his mouth and, very carefully, bit down. Cas’s hands clenched convulsively in his hair and he made a noise that Dean wasn’t sure whether to interpret as pained or pleased. He didn’t think Cas knew either since his hands couldn’t seem to decide if they were pulling Dean’s head closer or pushing it away. The sensitivity of Cas’s nipples definitely warranted further investigation another time, right now though, he was going somewhere. He moved his mouth across Cas’s stomach, giving him a gentle nip there. The noise Cas made was definitely appreciative that time. 

Dean hovered around Cas’s hipbone for a moment, not because he was nervous or anything, just because Cas had nice hipbones and he wanted to lick them. In this position, his mouth was only a couple of inches from Cas’s hard dick. In for a penny, in for a pound, he supposed... well, there wasn’t going to be any pounding just yet, but he didn’t only want to touch Cas, he wanted him in his mouth. He looked at Cas’s cock, part awe, part apprehension, wondering where to start. Dean had received plenty of blowjobs, it shouldn’t be too difficult to reverse engineer the process, right? His hand was still on Cas’s cock, he stopped stroking and held it round the base, angling it up slightly toward his mouth. Dean gave the head a slow lick. The noise of absolute rapture that Cas made at the first touch of his tongue sent a thrill through Dean. It also guaranteed that Cas was going to be getting a lot more blow jobs in the future. 

Dean took the head of Cas’s cock in his mouth. He ran his tongue around it cautiously before sliding his lips a little further down the length. It felt a bit awkward at first. He had no idea dicks were so unwieldly. He wasn’t sure how he was supposed to fit this thing in his mouth without choking. Dean did his best to relax his racing heart and, perhaps just as importantly, relax his throat. Cas was still making those incredibly flattering noises and knowing that he was enjoying it made Dean feel more confident. After a while, he realised he was enjoying too, the weight and feel of Cas’s cock in his mouth, the soft skin under his tongue, the salty hint of precome that Dean had coaxed from him, the way the girth stretched his lips and, god, the noises, the beautiful helpless noises that Cas made under his ministrations. He wanted to spend the rest of his life finding all the different ways he could entice Cas to make those noises. At some point, Dean registered that he was moaning almost as loud as Cas was. A little to his surprise, he was loving this. How had Dean never known that doing this to someone you.... How had he never known that doing this was amazing? 

Dean was aware of the lube still lying on the mattress. He thought about coating his fingers with it and pushing them inside Cas. But that was something he really thought you should ask before trying. His mouth was so delightfully full of Cas's cock and he didn't want to stop what he was doing long enough to have a conversation about doing more. Probably better not to overcomplicate things the first time round anyway, better to focus on one new thing at a time. So, he focused on Cas’s cock, taking a little more of it into his mouth. His hand was still wrapped around the base, so he only took in another inch or so. As well as this was going, he didn’t think he was ready to start trying to deep throat Cas like a damn porn star. Dean rubbed his tongue along the underside of Cas’s cock as he guided the head toward the roof of his mouth. He sucked lightly and felt Cas tense beneath him, so he did it again and kept up the movement of his tongue. The frequency of Cas’s moans increased until he made a particularly loud sound and Dean’s mouth suddenly filled with come. Despite this being the outcome Dean had intended, the burst of liquid still felt like somewhat of a shock, though a good one. He pulled back and swallowed hastily. 

Dean sat up and reached for the glass on the bedside table. He gulped a few mouthfuls of water before he put the glass back down and settled in to sit by Cas’s waist, legs curled under him as he looked down at his lover. His hand was on Cas’s hip, thumb gently rubbing circles there. 

“Was that okay?” Dean asked. He was pretty sure he knew the answer, but he still needed to check. 

"Wonderful... that was wonderful, darling-” 

“Darling?” Dean couldn’t help interrupting. 

"Don’t humans normally use terms of endearment for each other in these sorts of situations?" Cas asked, looking a little embarrassed. 

“Sweetheart, you can call me whatever you like,” Dean said, grinning. 

Cas trying to use endearments was, well, endearing. Dean realised that he’d been thinking that about Cas a lot lately. He had tried to repress his feelings for Cas for such a long time and now that he’d embraced them, now he was actually letting himself feel things for Cas, those feelings just snowballed. The more he actually let himself look at Cas that way, as someone he was allowed to be attracted to, the more he saw that made him fall deeper. Cute as it was, Cas didn't need to use pet names. The way he said 'Dean' was so full of affection that it warmed him far more than anyone calling him ‘babe’ ever had. Nonetheless, Dean found he was more than happy to be Cas’s darling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I was writing this, I was trying to find a balance between giving a sense of Dean's nervousness while still making this scene sexy. Hopefully I managed that! Let me know what you think :)
> 
> I'll be updating this on a frequent non-scheduled schedule through the rest of December. There will be some wholesome Christmas escapades coming up.


	5. Chapter 5

Dean was happy, after spending so much of his life as a nomad, to have the stability of not just a real home, but of a partner who shared it with him. Even more than the bunker, Cas was home to Dean. He knew that Cas was happy too. He'd smiled more in the past month than in all the years Dean had known him. Cas had become so much more than that cold, marble statue of an angel he’d been when they first met. Dean felt privileged that a relationship with him was how Cas wanted to exercise the free will that he’d fought so hard for. Cas was still pretty new to the whole human emotion thing. So, it meant a lot to Dean that caring for him, maybe even loving him, was what Cas was doing with his new found ability to feel things deeper than the average angel. Perhaps Dean was getting ahead of himself, they hadn't even been together a whole month yet. It was just, he'd already been feeling so much for Cas before they got together and he couldn't help hoping that Cas felt the same. As scared as he was to even think the word ‘love’, he wanted it so badly. 

Since that night as the bar, without really discussing what it meant, they had fallen into a relationship. They had already been so close that, in some ways, not much had changed, but the changes there had been were wonderful. During the day, they were even closer than they had been. Cas always scooched his chair right next to Dean’s when they researched now. He curled up with Dean when they watched TV in the evening. He lay his head in Dean’s lap on the rare occasions that Dean actually had a chance to read a book that wasn’t research (the head in the lap thing was far too distracting if he was supposed to be working). There were affectionate touches and long looks that Dean knew there'd be follow through on now- when Cas looked at him like that, he was actually going to get laid. At night, they slept together, or Dean slept, anyway, while Cas watched over him. Sometimes they fooled around, sometimes they just cuddled, but they always spent the night in the same bed. Then, in the morning, they had breakfast together. Dean came up with new strange foods for Cas to try: bacon drizzled in honey, cinnamon toast crunch with hot sauce instead of milk and some expensive dark chocolate flavoured with chili peppers that he’d bought specially for Cas. Admittedly, chocolate wasn't even remotely a breakfast food but Dean liked starting the day watching Cas experiment to see what flavours he could actually taste. He was always so pleased to find something he liked and Cas had enjoyed the combination of heat and sweetness in the chocolate. 

Dean woke up that morning feeling more excited about Christmas than he had since he was a kid. Hell, he hadn’t actually felt this excited about Christmas as a kid. The holidays didn’t normally mean much to him, but sharing them with Cas? That felt meaningful. He blinked his eyes open to find Cas already watching him, as usual. He was getting used to that. 

“Good morning, Dean.” 

“Merry Christmas, gorgeous,” he said and kissed Cas on the nose simply because it was the closest place to plant one on him. The action made Cas cross his eyes as he looked down to where lips touched him and Dean laughed at the face he was making. Cas looked adorably confused and Dean pulled him closer for a proper kiss. When he drew back, Cas’s look of confusion had been replaced with a soft, satisfied expression that was slightly dreamy. Dean brought his hand up to gently stroke Cas’s cheek. Just lying here next to Cas, he felt more content than he’d ever been. 

They lay in bed for a while, kissing and talking until Dean heard a noise in the hallway. He looked towards his door and his eye was caught by the sprig of mistletoe hanging above it. He smiled fondly at the plastic foliage. A week ago, Sam had hung that mistletoe over the doorway to the library. Dean figured it was his way of saying, ‘hey, I totally support you and I’m cool with you kissing a dude’. It was rather sweet and Dean had been all too happy to explain the purpose of mistletoe to a baffled Cas. Things might have gotten a little out of hand. Dean had ended up shoving Cas against the library wall and Sam had walked in on them kissing passionately... possibly there had been some grinding against each other too, but they were still dressed at least, so it wasn’t _that_ bad. Besides, Sam had no one but himself to blame for putting the mistletoe there in the first place. Unsurprisingly, the decoration was gone later that day. The mistletoe had reappeared the next day. This time it was over Dean’s doorframe, _inside_ of his room. He figured that was Sam’s way of saying, ‘I’m cool with you kissing a dude, but you’re my brother and maybe I don’t need to see you kissing that dude quite so enthusiastically’. Which was fair enough, he had no interest in seeing Sammy get that carried away with a partner either. 

“Come on, lazy bones. Sam’s up and about, so it’s time for presents.” 

They joined Sam for breakfast in the kitchen before heading to the Dean Cave (‘I’m still not calling it that,' Sam insisted, in what was, frankly, a very Scrooge-like fashion). Dean had moved the wonky Christmas tree from the library to the Dean Cave, which was much cosier, and added some twinkly red and green lights to the tree, which he felt upgraded it from pathetic to festive. There was a scattering of presents around the base. The fact that there were presents at all was pretty rare and the fact that they were actually wrapped- no matter how messily- in bright Christmas paper was rarer still. It was a little slap dash but that was just the Winchester way. It didn’t matter, it was Christmas and he was here with his family. It was perfect and Dean could feel a giant, goofy grin spreading across his face as they all sat down cross legged in front of the tree. 

“Happy Christmas,” Sam said, as he shoved a slim rectangle wrapped in cartoon Santa paper at Dean. 

“Merry Christmas, bro,” he replied, laughing. “I think we might have gotten each other the same thing,” he continued as he handed Sam his own slim rectangle wrapped in cartoon Rudolphs. 

Sam ripped off the paper and uncovered a computer magazine. It was the first issue of the subscription Dean had brought him. 

“Hey, are you suggesting my computer skills need work?” 

“You’re the one that said they needed work- I'm just being helpful here!” 

Sam grumbled but he looked happy enough with the gift. He had said that he wanted to improve his IT skills. He was pretty handy with computer, but it was a field that was always changing, so it was good to keep abreast of new tech. Dean thought Sam’s sudden interest in learning more might be somewhat motivated by jealousy. Dean had picked up some pretty nifty things from Frank and Charlie. Computers had always been more Sam’s thing, but now Dean’s expertise rivalled his own. Still, Dean wasn’t going to call him on it, partly because it would have been a bitch move to do so and partly because he thought it’d be good for Sam to learn more. Hacking was a useful skill for the modern hunter to have. Not that a mainstream computer magazine was likely to have tips on hacking, but it couldn’t hurt. 

Dean tore the wrapping off his own present and immediately regretted it. He shifted uncomfortably and tried to use the crumpled paper to obscure the gift while he glared daggers at his brother. 

“I ordered it over a month ago!” Sam said, sounding defensive, as well he might. 

An issue of Busty Asian Beauties was kind of an awkward gift to open sitting next to your new boyfriend. Sam was going to pay for this. When he realised it was a magazine, Dean had naively thought it would be a car magazine, or maybe Guns & Ammo. But nope, his little brother had brought him a skin mag. Worse, it was the first magazine in a subscription, so he got to feel this awkward eleven more times this year. Dean didn’t know how to act with Cas sitting right there. Sure, people who had partners still looked at porn, but it didn’t seem right to flaunt it in your partner’s face. Not unless it was something you were deliberately looking at together. And he had no idea if Cas would want to do that. Moreover, he wasn’t sure of the etiquette of looking at straight porn when you were in a relationship with a man. God, was porn etiquette even a thing? Dean didn’t want to make Cas insecure. He didn’t want him thinking that Dean would prefer to be with a woman. Dean still liked women of course. Women were great and dating a guy hadn’t switched off his appreciation of them. But he was perfectly content with Cas. He didn’t need anyone else, man or woman. He wasn’t secretly missing straight sex when the gay sex he was having was more than enough to keep him satisfied. Dean had come to realise that sex was just sex, regardless of the gender of the person he was with. And sex was even better with someone you cared about, which meant sex with Cas was the best sex he’d ever had. 

Dean was distracted by the thoughts, so he was too slow to stop Cas when he plucked the magazine from Dean’s hands and started flicking through it. Dean watched in horror as Cas turned the magazine sideways to pull out the centrefold. He tilted his head to look at it thoughtfully and then leant over to Dean. 

“Is this the kind of thing you'd like me to do for you?” Cas asked quietly. 

Dean glared at his brother as if to say, ‘look what you did to my angel, you monster’! 

Sam returned the look with one of his own that might have meant ‘I’m sorry’ but could have just as easily meant ‘you should be thanking me’! 

“Maybe we should talk about that later, in private,” Dean said, reaching out to pat Cas’s knee. Cas just nodded silently and went back to studying the picture, tilting his head in the other direction to look at it from a different angle. 

Dean couldn't decide if he was annoyed about the magazine because of some weird impulse to protect Cas from anything that might be slightly sordid, or because he was the only one who was allowed to corrupt Cas. Probably the latter. It was Dean’s job to teach Cas about sex, not Sam’s and certainly not a porno mag’s. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to know what picture Cas was looking at. Either it was going to be something he wished Cas hadn’t learnt about from a magazine this early on in their relationship. Or it was going to be something he really freaking wanted Cas to do right now. Dean didn’t particularly want to spend the remainder of their gift exchange with an awkward hard-on while he tried to focus on doing Christmas bullshit instead of whisking Cas back to their bedroom. He wanted to do dirty things to Cas, god, so many dirty things, but he didn’t want to rush Cas into anything he wasn’t ready for. He only wanted to do those filthy things if Cas was comfortable and only if Cas knew what they were doing was in the context of a committed relationship. He still had this niggling fear that Cas might think that Dean only wanted sex. He needed Cas to know that, unlike the pizzaman and the babysitter, he truly loved him. Of course, the sensible thing to do would just be to tell him that, but since when did Dean do the sensible thing? 

Dean sighed and looked at Cas out of the corner of his eye. Cas was still leafing through the magazine with a studious expression on his face. At least he wasn’t traumatised, only curious, so Dean probably didn’t need to murder Sam for exposing Cas to this. Perhaps Cas was less innocent than he’d thought anyway. Dean was reminded of the time that Cas had actually brought him a copy of Busty Asian Beauties when he went on a supply run. He wondered what Cas had been thinking. Had he thought about Dean masturbating, had he wanted to be the cause of that, had he wanted to insert himself in some small, indirect way into the act of Dean jerking off because Dean would be touching himself to something Cas had given him? Or had he just brought everything he normally saw Dean buy, beer and porno mag and all. He hoped it was the former because the idea of Cas fantasising about Dean touching himself was really hot. Okay, he needed to get off this train of thought before things got awkward. Dean gave Sam one last glare, then he gently took the magazine from Cas’s hands and replaced it with a gift wrapped in gold paper and topped with shiny red ribbon. 

“It’s nothing special, but I got you a little something,” he told Cas gruffly. 

Cas smiled and ripped off the paper with all the enthusiasm of a kid on Christmas morning. He unveiled a smallish wicker hamper full of a variety of fancy hot sauces. 

“I know you like things spicy,” Dean said and instantly regretted his phrasing when Sam snickered. He threw a ball of crumpled up wrapping paper at his head. 

“This is very thoughtful, thank you.” 

Dean had something else for Cas but he figured he’d give it to him later. He’d brought him a ridiculous pair of boxer shorts with mistletoe on them, because they’d made him smile when he saw them in the store. Sammy had probably been scarred enough by the original mistletoe incident though, so Dean thought he’d spare him the reminder. 

“Sam got you something too,” he said, nudging his brother. 

“Happy Christmas, Cas,” Sam said as he handed over a small cylindrical shape covered in Santas. 

Cas opened the paper to reveal a jar of artisanal honey. 

“Dean said that you like sweet things too. I got it at the farmer's market. They said it’s made by local bees, so, who knows, maybe some of them got nectar from flowers out front.” 

There was a small patch of wildflowers outside the bunker’s entrance, so it was entirely possible that the honey might be made from nectar from those flowers. Even if it didn’t seem very likely, the thought seemed to please Cas who was smiling slightly at the jar. 

“This is very sweet, Sam, thank you. I have something for you too.” 

Cas passed Sam a present wrapped in Rudolph paper he’d purloined from Dean. It turned out to be a book by an author that Dean had never heard of, on a subject he didn’t understand. The book seemed to make Sam’s little nerd heart happy though, which pleased Cas, which in turn pleased Dean, so they all sat around grinning stupidly for a bit before Cas cleared his throat. 

“I know you said you only wanted me for Christmas,” Cas said to Dean softly, “but since you already have me, I got you something else too.” 

“Aw, Cas, you didn’t have to,” Dean said, but he grinned when Cas handed him a gift. 

It was wrapped in silver paper decorated with bright sprigs of mistletoe, which made Dean smile. Looked like he wasn’t the only one with fond memories of the mistletoe incident. Two pieces of wrapping paper had been put on either side of the largish box and haphazardly folded over. The whole thing had then been wrapped a dozen times in tape going both lengthwise and widthwise around the box. It was a very thorough job and looked impossible to get into. Luckily, Dean had put his boots on earlier, so he had his trusty boot knife. A hunter should never go anywhere without a knife as far as he was concerned, even if he was only going to open presents apparently. Carefully, he sliced away the tape to get to the gift underneath. It was a colourful box covered in foamy mugs of beer. Bold black letters declared it to be a Brew Your Own Beer Kit from Family Business Beer Co. 

“This is awesome, Cas! I’ve always wanted to try making beer. How did you know?” 

“You mentioned how much you liked the microbrew you had when you were hunting a shojo at that brewery. I thought you might like to make your own, so Sam helped me find the kit online.” 

“I can’t believe you remembered that, it was years ago,” Dean whispered, feeling touched. 

“I pay attention to the things you tell me,” Cas replied, ducking his head shyly and shrugging. 

“Best Christmas ever!” Dean declared. 

He pulled Cas, and then Sam, who he was only slightly mad at now, into a hug. Dean kissed Cas’s cheek and wondered idly if he could make a beer that Cas would like when he got the hang of brewing. Maybe something citrusy, with a pillowy-soft body and fruity hops. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully I'll be uploading more Christmassy goodness soon- the next chapter will probably go up on Christmas eve.


	6. Chapter 6

Cas insisted on cooking for them. Dean wasn’t sure of the wisdom of letting the guy with a limited ability to taste be the one in charge of Christmas dinner, but Cas had been so enthusiastic that Dean didn’t have the heart to say anything. He would eat whatever monstrosity Cas served up and be grateful for it. Dean suspected that Cas had been reading cooking blogs again and was eager to try out something he’d found. Cas was a master of research, whether it was tracking down information about esoteric occult lore or finding the best Christmas recipes. He was fascinated by the vast amount of knowledge on the internet and excited by the fact that he could learn almost anything by googling it. Food seemed to be his latest obsession. He’d yet to find a blog that specialised in recommending food for angels living on earth- even the most obscure corners of the internet didn’t have anything like that. But he’d found a number of blogs that focused on dessert and others that were predominately recipes for spicy cuisine that he liked. 

Cas had disappeared shortly after the gift exchange and they’d left him to it. That was until a bang and something that smelled suspiciously like smoke had emanated from the kitchen. Sam and Dean had gone in to investigate and found Cas standing in the middle of the kitchen looking sheepish. Sheepish and adorable actually. God knew where he’d found it, but Cas was wearing a ridiculous frilly floral apron. Dean thought it suited him oddly enough. It felt very homey, Cas in the kitchen cooking for him in a silly apron. 

“Everything ok?” Dean asked, as he walked over to Cas and touched his shoulder. 

“Minor mishap. It’s fine now,” Cas said unconvincingly, while shooting glances at the oven like he half expected it to explode. 

“Uhhhhh, Cas, maybe you should-” Sam started to say, also while shooting glances at the oven, looking like he was wondering if they should evacuate the kitchen. 

“So, what are you making?” Dean said, cutting off whatever tactless thing Sam might be going to say. He’d been happy to let dinner be a surprise- he didn’t mind what Cas made, turkey, ham, hell, he’d eat a damn nut roast if Cas served it to him- but asking about the meal seemed a good way stop Sam talking. 

“I’m making a turducken,” Cas told them excitedly. 

_Oh...oh no..._

Dean paled enough to make his freckles stand out starkly and Sam’s eyebrows jumped so high that they just about went off his face. 

Cas continued on obliviously, “It’s three kinds of meat, Dean! The website said it was the perfect gift for the meat lover in your life.” 

“It’s...it’s something all right, Cas,” Dean said and kissed him on the cheek, both because he was grateful for the effort Cas was making for him and because the gesture allowed him to hide his face while he got his expression under control. Dean was sure it would be the perfect gift for any meat lover who hadn’t almost suffered a terrible fate at the hands of a turducken. 

When Dean pulled back, Sam was eyeing the kitchen door speakingly and motioning with his whole head that they should step outside. 

“Just... uh... just give us a sec,” Dean told Cas, before walking down the hallway with Sam. 

“Do we really have to eat that?” Sam asked in a whisper. 

“Yes! He’s working really hard on it,” Dean hissed back. 

“He remembers that time turducken nearly killed you, right?” 

Sam was overreacting- the turducken hadn’t nearly killed Dean, only almost turned him into a mindless drone ripe for the slaughter. Anyway, it wasn’t Sam who’d almost been zombified, so he should shut up about it. 

“Of course he doesn’t remember- he had amnesia!” Dean said defensively. The plot by the leviathans to turn people into complacent cattle by drugging food, starting with those damn delicious turducken slammers at Biggersons, had happened when Cas had lost his memory and been living as Emmanuel. “You can hardly blame him for being out of the loop. And it’s not like I had time to catch him when he did get his memory back, what with him taking all your crazy into himself and checking into the freaking nut house!” 

Sam made a face like he wasn’t quite sure how Cas taking on his memories of hell meant he had to eat turducken now, but, dammit, Dean was eating it, so Sam was eating it too and no one was saying a bad word about it to Cas! 

“Just shut up and stay out of the way, okay?” Dean said grumpily, not waiting for an answer before he stomped back to the kitchen to check on Cas. 

Cas was fiddling with the knobs on the oven. He still seemed slightly flustered but he turned around and gave Dean a bright smile when he entered the kitchen. 

“Do you need a hand with anything?” Dean asked. 

“No, no, I have everything under control,” Cas assured him. “Relax with Sam and, um, go watch the game?” Cas’s intonation rose like he wasn’t quite sure he was getting the activity right. 

“You’re thinking of Thanksgiving, sweetheart. There isn’t normally a game on Christmas,” Dean said, leaning up against the counter next to Cas. 

“Then what do you do on Christmas?” 

“Mostly watch old movies.” 

“Right, go do that then. I have everything under control,” he reiterated. 

Nothing was actually on fire, so Dean figured it was safe to leave Cas to it since that was what he wanted. He went to hang out with Sam in the Dean Cave. They ended up watching The Goonies, because anything that had the Rudy hobbit in it got Dean’s vote. 

Cas called them into the kitchen not long after the movie ended. He was standing next to the table looking both nervous and hesitantly proud. There was an impressive spread laid out with the beautifully cooked, lovingly made turducken at the centre, surrounded by all the trimmings. There were roast vegetables, mashed potatoes and gravy that Dean suspected was made from scratch. 

“This looks great,” he said, wrapping an arm round Cas’s waist as he stood next to him after placing a plate in front of Dean. He was entirely sincere since, despite his conflicted feelings about the turducken, it did look and smell amazing. 

“Is this the part where we go round the table and say what we're thankful for?” Cas asked, as he sat down next to Dean. 

“That's thanksgiving again, babe,” Dean said gently. 

“But I'm thankful for things.” Cas frowned, wrinkling his nose adorably. “There are too many turkey-based holidays. It’s confusing. I don’t see why you wouldn’t be thankful on Christmas too.” 

“We can say what we’re thankful for today too if you want, Cas,” Dean said, smiling at him. 

“I’m thankful for you, Dean,” Cas said very seriously. 

“Oh, shush..." Dean could feel his cheeks warm. "I’m thankful for you too.”

“And I’m thankful for this, uh, lovely meal.” Sam had never looked less thankful in his entire life, but Cas beamed at his words anyway. 

Dean looked down at his plate and screwed up his courage. _You can do this. Cas definitely isn’t trying to poison you. You love turducken. It’s like the perfect storm of your top three edible birds._ He took a tentative bite as he finished his inner pep talk. _Wow._ The turducken was some real gourmet shit. The organic, free-range birds had been cooked to perfection. The meat was juicy and flavoursome, about a million times better than the overprocessed, fast food turducken sandwich he’d had at Biggersons. Nonetheless, Dean couldn’t help staring down at the delicious meat on his plate suspiciously between mouthfuls, as if waiting for it to start oozing grey goo. If he concentrated really hard on not thinking about the mutant slammer that had nearly melted his brain, the birds actually tasted awesome. Dean looked over at Cas to see how he was enjoying the fruits of his labour and realised that Cas was only delicately picking at his own turducken. 

“I’ll be right back,” Dean said, jumping up from the table. 

He headed down the corridor to the Dean Cave and rooted around in the hamper of hot sauces he’d given Cas earlier. He picked out the one made with ghost peppers since it was the spiciest. Honestly, it was hotter than anything Dean himself could handle, not that he'd ever admit that given he prided himself on his very manly taste buds. He presented it to Cas with a flourish when he returned to the kitchen. 

“Here, for your turducken, so you can taste it better. It’s the hottest thing in the bunker,” he said. 

“You’re the hottest thing in the bunker,” Cas returned with a look on his face like he couldn't decide if he should be proud or ashamed of that line. He doubled down though and winked at Dean. It was an honest to goodness flirty wink and it was fucking precious. Cas's lines weren’t getting any less cheesy, but they still warmed Dean’s heart and made his pulse race. And yeah, maybe he had called the hot sauce the hottest thing in the bunker just to see if Cas would tell him he was hotter than the sauce, just like he’d told him he was sweeter than the syrup. But, so what, didn’t he deserve someone who said nice things to him? Cas clearly thought he was worthy of compliments and affection, so Dean was trying to let himself be comfortable receiving those. He was slowly getting better at it. 

They spent the meal talking and laughing. Cas dug into his food with more gusto once he’d slathered it in hot sauce. Dean wolfed down the meat with hardly any hesitation. And Sam finished his turducken under Dean’s watchful eye (and maybe a couple of subtle kicks under the table when it looked like he might be going to leave food on his plate). Once they were finished, Cas got up and bustled around the kitchen. He fetched more beers and plates before getting something out of the warming drawer beneath the oven. 

“Do you have room for dessert?” he asked, setting a dish down on the table. 

“Oh god, Cas, you made pie?” 

“Dean, are you crying?” Sam said. 

“I'm not crying, you're crying!” 

“That makes zero sense.” 

“Shut up, Sam!” 

Dean wasn’t crying, not really, he was just a little misty eyed. It was no one’s business but his if Cas baking him pie was a secret fantasy of Dean’s. There was just something about the man he loved taking care of him, making something he knew Dean loved just for him, that warmed Dean right the way through. The pie was apple and had a perfect flaky lattice top sprinkled with sugar. It was sweet and tart and so obviously made with love that Dean might have teared up again when he took his first bite. 

They lingered in the kitchen nursing beers long after the food was gone. Sam finally left the table around the time Dean and Cas started playing footsie under it. That was fine, he’d eaten all his turducken and two slices of pie, so Cas was happy. 

Dean was happy too when they ended the night with Cas trying that thing he’d seen in the magazine earlier.

“Best Christmas ever,” Dean told Cas again, before falling asleep wrapped in his arms, cosy and content. 


	7. Chapter 7

“C’mon, Sammy, it’s New Year’s Eve- we gotta celebrate! 

“Do we though?” Sam asked sceptically. “Since when do we celebrate New Year? And since when do you actually care about celebrating it?” 

“Since Cas...” Dean admitted quietly. 

Maybe it was a little unusual for Dean to be this enthusiastic. Maybe it was even a little unusual for him to be this happy, but he was going to damn well enjoy it. Like Christmas, New Year’s Eve didn’t normally mean much to him. Despite all the new beginnings and dumb resolutions stuff people touted, it was just another day and shit usually stayed the same. Which was fine actually, because Dean happened to like how things were most of the time. But this year felt different. The future was unfurling in front of him. It was bright and good and full of Cas and love and happiness and things Dean hadn't thought that he'd get to have, hadn’t even really felt like he deserved. It felt like a new beginning. Sappy as that was, Dean was going to make the most of it. And making the most of it right now meant celebrating a holiday he didn’t usually care about, because it turned out he did care if he got to share it with Cas. 

“Me and Cas are going to Duke’s. You coming or what?” 

“Duke’s?” 

“The bar where Cas and me-” -fucked in the parking lot- “-got together.” 

“Alright, just let me go change,” Sam said, walking down the corridor to his room. 

“What you’re wearing is fine- you don’t have to change into assless leather chaps just because we’re going to a gay bar!” Dean called after him and laughed when Sam flipped him the bird over his shoulder and muttered something about having been to a gay bar before. 

They piled into the Impala a short while later. Sam was in the back, luckily not in assless chaps- he would not be allowed to sit on Baby’s precious leather seats in those. He’d just changed into a clean pair of jeans and a smarter shirt. 

“Okay, let’s get into the spirit of things,” Dean said, grabbing his phone since he didn’t have what he wanted on cassette. “Siri, play New Year’s Day by Bon Jovi.” 

“Bon Jovi?” Sam asked dubiously. 

“Bon Jovi rocks,” Dean defended himself as he turned the car key and Baby rumbled to life. “On occasion,” he clarified, pointing an emphatic finger at Sam and pulling away from the bunker. 

“Dude, this is just an objectively bad song.” 

“It’s seasonal. I’m going for an ambience here.” 

“If the ambience you're going for is dull, then it’s working,” Sam bitched. “If you’re going to play crap just because it’s seasonal, you might as well put on New Year’s Day by Taylor Swift.” 

“Yes, let’s listen to that,” Cas piped up. 

_No, no!_ He couldn’t... but it was what Cas wanted... 

“Fine, we’ll put on that abomination. Defile this sacred space,” Dean said, turning to glare at his brother. 

“You’re such a drama queen,” Sam said, entirely without sympathy for Dean’s suffering. 

“Hey, you don’t get to call me a queen just 'cause I'm fucking a dude now!” 

Sam smacked his shoulder. “I’m calling you that because you’re being fucking dramatic!” 

Dean grumbled. As far as he was concerned, his reaction was totally proportionate to the situation. It hurt deep down in his soul to play a trashy pop song in Baby, but he’d do it, he’d do it for Cas. 

“Siri, play New Year’s Day by Taylor Swift.” He glared at Sam again. “Pop! Pop, in my own car, Sam. Look what you made me do.” 

“You know that’s the name of one of her songs, right?” he asked, laughing. 

“Shut up, Sam!” 

They drove in silence for a while apart from Cas humming along off-key to the song. Spotify must be playing the album or song radio or something, because the music segued straight into Shake It Off next. Dean found his fingers tapping on the steering wheel a little. Okay, he could admit that he thought this one was catchy, but it was probably only because Charlie had played him the Screaming Females version of the song and that was actually pretty good. It didn’t count as liking a Taylor Swift song if you just liked the rock cover of it, right? Yeah, that was fine. 

After another couple of songs, Dean put on some Metallica to cleanse Baby of the taint of Taylor Swift. He felt much better once he was singing along to Whisky in the Jar and they drove the rest of the way to Duke’s with acceptable music playing. 

Dean smiled widely when they got to the bar, not even caring that he could hear strains of another damn Taylor Swift song coming from inside. This was where he got together with Cas. They could play as much terrible pop music as they liked and he’d still love this place. He stood by the Impala for a moment and just watched Cas as he walked up to the door of the bar. Dean had persuaded Cas out of the trench coat for once- well, he’d talked Cas out of the trench coat rather a lot lately, but he’d actually got him to wear something else this time. Cas was in a pair of dark jeans and a green t-shirt looking entirely too cute. 

Cas paused in the doorway. “Are you coming, Dean?” 

He just smiled at Cas and walked over, putting his hand on the small of Cas’s back as they went inside. Sam headed straight for the bar to get them drinks, while they hung back near the entrance. Dean gave Cas a brief one-armed hug and settled his hand on his hip, gently squeezing him to his side. It was nice to be somewhere where this was unremarkable. He would probably be this affectionate with Cas in any bar, because, fuck it, he could handle himself in a fight. But as much as he was confident in his ability to stand up for himself, he appreciated that they were in a space where he wouldn’t have to. No one would make some asshole comment about them or try to start a fight just because they were two dudes here. Dean felt a surprising sense of belonging in spite of the cheesy pop music playing. 

The bar was pretty busy, but Dean spotted a few guys vacating a table to head over to the dancefloor, where there were actually people dancing tonight instead of just loitering around drinking. He led Cas over to the newly empty table and they took a seat. He glanced over to see if Sam had their drinks yet and realised that he was busy getting chatted up at the bar by a short blond guy- well he looked short, but who wouldn’t next to that sasquatch. Sam looked mildly awkward, like he was trying to figure out how to say he was straight without looking like he was panicking just because he was getting hit on by a dude. He must have figured out some tactful way to say it though, because they smiled at each other, and Sam nodded over to Dean and Cas, as if to say, ‘I’m just here with those idiots.’ The blond guy said something that made him laugh and then Sam was headed over to them carrying three beers and trying not to bump into too many people. _Damn, should have told him to get Cas a cocktail,_ Dean thought. Cas drank the beer without complaint, even though Dean knew he would have preferred something sweeter. They chatted for a while before Dean glanced over at the crowded dancefloor. 

“Let’s dance,” he suggested impulsively. 

“First celebrating the holidays and now dancing. Jeez, what’s gotten into you?” Sam asked. 

“Cas,” Dean said smirking. 

Sam made a face like he really didn’t want to know if Dean meant that literally. 

“You two go ahead, I think I’ll stay here and finish my beer.” 

Dean led a slightly bemused Cas over to the dancefloor. He had no idea when the last time he danced was, it felt like years ago. He was pretty sure Cas had never danced at all. Dean started moving and nodded at Cas encouragingly for him to do the same. He’d definitely never danced before. Cas was, well, he was terrible. He was an absolute fucking disaster. But he was a beautiful disaster and something in Dean’s chest went all gooey from watching him. Cas danced awkwardly, his movements uncertain and stilted, but with a hesitant smile on his face. Every so often he’d look at Dean enquiringly, as if to ask, ‘am I do this right?’ He really wasn’t, but Dean enjoyed watching him try. 

“Sweetheart, you gotta relax.” Dean put his hands on Cas’s hips and rubbed soothingly. “Loosen up. It’s supposed to feel good- like sex,” he told him winking. Though as he watched Cas, he thought whoever had come up with that whole sex is analogous to dancing got it wrong, at least when it came to Cas, because Cas was an atrocious dancer, but he was amazing in bed. “Just let your body move to the music.”

“Like Madonna says?” Cas asked. 

Oh god, did Dean just accidently quote Madonna? What was becoming of him? 

“Yeah, like Madonna says,” he replied with a sigh. 

The DJ had played Vogue earlier, damn thing must have gotten in his head. He wondered if he could actually find a gay bar that played rock. They had to exist right? Even if he found one, he’d probably keep bringing Cas here anyway. Cas loved all this pop diva stuff and Dean loved Cas, more than enough to put up with some annoyingly catchy, overly upbeat tunes. Maybe he could find a rock cover of Vogue that would make the song more palatable to him. Probably not. 

Cas did loosen up eventually, but that didn’t make him a better dancer. He had sped up and his movements were frenetic. It looked like he might be having some kind of fit. He was smiling exuberantly though, and the expression made the gooey thing in Dean’s chest get even gooier. His heart might have actually melted by this point. Cas was waving his arms around wildly. Apparently, he had taken the DJ at his word when he told them to put their hands in the air like they just didn’t care earlier. Given how much Dean knew Cas did care, about everything, it was nice to see him let go like this. Still, he was kind of surprised Cas hadn’t hit anyone yet, what with all the flailing. Single Ladies came on and the manic enthusiasm of his dancing ramped up a notch. 

“Put your hands up,” Cas said, nudging him when the lyrics instructed those up in the club to do so. 

“I am not obligated to do something just because Beyoncé says so!” Dean objected. 

Cas looked at him like he wasn’t convinced, doing an adorable little doubtful squint in Dean’s direction. 

“I’m not a single lady, Cas,” Dean told him firmly. 

But Cas looked disappointed, so Dean relented and put his hands up. He hoped Sam wasn’t looked in their direction or he’d never hear the end of this. Cas rewarded him with a smile so bright that he found he didn’t care even if Sam did see him dancing to Single Ladies. Maybe Beyoncé had a point, Dean thought as he looked over at Cas, he did like it and he should put a ring in it. Terrible taste in music notwithstanding, Cas was a keeper. 

A slow song came on and Dean pulled a still wilding gyrating Cas into his arms. Dean never did get to go to prom, so he didn’t really know how to slow dance. He just put an arm around Cas’s waist and took his hand and waltzed him around before twirling Cas under his arm, making him laugh. Cas sounded fucking giddy. Dean had done that. Made an angel of the lord weak in the knees. He grinned and gave Cas a quick kiss before pulling him closer. They swayed slowly, vaguely in time to the music, with as much of their bodies pressed together as they could manage. They stayed like that for a long time, even when the music sped up again, before Dean decided to go get another drink. He stopped by the table to see if Sam wanted one too and found him laughing with the same blond dude he'd been chatting to earlier. He waved off the offer of another drink, holding up a full glass of coke, so Dean headed over to the bar to get something for him and Cas, something sweet this time. 

When he finally got to the front of the crowded bar, Dean ordered Cas an appletini again. The shelf behind the bartender was laden with various syrups for other cocktails. So, Dean asked the guy if he could add a shot of the sweetest one to the appletini, even though Dean knew syrup didn’t normally go in the cocktail. _Since when did I become someone who knows how to make an appletini?_ Dean wondered. Still, he knew Cas would appreciate the extra sweetness. 

“You got a sweet tooth, huh?” the bartender asked, grinning at him. 

“My boyfriend does,” Dean said, looking over his shoulder at Cas, before grinning back. It was the first time he’d said that out loud he realised. It sounded good, it sounded really good. 

“Which one?” the bartender asked as he mixed the cocktail. 

“The one in the green t-shirt dancing like a maniac,” Dean said fondly. 

“You make a cute couple,” the guy said, looking over to the dancefloor where Cas’s erratic arm waving had cleared a small circle around him. 

_We really do,_ Dean thought. Though it occurred to him that the couple thing wasn’t really a unilateral decision. Perhaps, he should check Cas was on the same page. Jesus, asking someone if he could be their boyfriend made him feel fifteen again. He paid for their drinks and went back over to Cas. Dean was pretty sure he couldn’t dance with the appletini without throwing syrupy green liquid over half the dancefloor, so he suggested they go back to the table. At some point, the number of chairs at their table had dwindled, so Sam ceded the seats to them and went to dance with his new friend. The music changed shortly after he got up. Dean smiled when he recognised the song as Baby One More Time. Sam started to dance dorkily to Britney Spears, so he wouldn’t have a leg to stand on later if he wanted to give Dean a hard time about dancing to Beyoncé. He was still smiling when he looked over at Cas. 

“Hey Cas,” he started nervously. 

“Yes, Dean?” 

“Are you my boyfriend?” he blurted out. _Oh god, real smooth Dean._

Cas looked flattered by the question rather than embarrassed for him, so Dean didn’t feel like he’d messed up too badly. But asking the question like that did kind of make him feel like the ditsy, awkward lead in a bad chick flick. Cas put down his cocktail and leant towards Dean, cupping the side of his face with one hand. 

“I'm the one who loves you above all others, so I suppose you could call that a boyfriend, though it hardly seems like an adequate word,” Cas said seriously. 

“I love you too,” Dean said. Cas glowed at that and went a little blurry. It took Dean a moment to realise Cas was blurry because Dean had gone all teary eyed. He cleared his throat self-consciously. “What would you call it then?” he asked, just for something to say, so he could focus on talking instead of crying. 

“There’s a word in Enochian,” Cas said, before making a series of garbled noises that Dean supposed counted as a word in the angelic language. 

“What’s that mean?” 

“Loosely translated, it means soulmate.” 

Well, that didn’t help Dean to stop crying at all, but he found he was too happy to care about the fact that there were tears spilling down his cheeks while he sat in a crowded bar. _Soulmate,_ Dean thought to himself in wonder, _soulmate._ That sounded good, even better than boyfriend.

**Author's Note:**

> Yay, I managed to finish my New Year's Eve chapter before actual New Year! Hope you guys enjoyed it :)
> 
> I'd love to hear from you. Kudos and comments mean the world to me because I crave your validation the way Dean craves his father's approval! 
> 
> Also, I’m on tumblr: [alivinghumangirl.tumblr.com](https://alivinghumangirl.tumblr.com/) I have no idea what I’m doing there- come say hi!


End file.
